Do you know what’s hotter than a younger woman?  An older woman.  What’s hotter than an older woman?  A married older woman.

       I’d like to get married someday.  Just haven’t found the right woman.  I’m sure she’s out there somewhere.  While I’m sitting at home at the computer writing this.

     I was thinking about getting religion to find a girl.  I mean me getting religion, not religion actually… never mind. 

     Anything to please the ladies, right?  I would debase my deepest convictions, praying to a fictional supernatural being used as a crutch by weak people, just for a little tail.

     But surely a religious girl would be a better cook than a hippie girl.  I don’t want to eat Budget Gourmet frozen dinners and breadsticks for the rest of my life, even if the chick does smoke some killer hashish. 

     But what would I talk about with my religious bride?  I hear those repressed chicks can be pretty naughty.  Would she dress up like a cheerleader for me?  Would she tell me nasty things with the sweetest voice?  Does she know where I can get some killer hashish?

     I like women in high heels, but hippie girls can’t walk in them.  It’s bad when your date tumbles to the ground before the first drink.  Hell, I could do better than that, but that’s a whole ‘nother story.

     And I don’t really dig chicks who drink beer.  I’m a red wine man myself.  I have cultivated tastes.  None of that cheap stuff for my special lady.  Heck, I’d go ten bucks a box.

     So in my quest for the right girl I examine the left index finger of every woman I meet.  Well, almost every one.  Not the chick with no left arm, right?

2026 R.M. Reliable Electric